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Thread: T3... our worst fears confirmed!

  1. #101
    Member
    Registered: May 2000
    Location: North of the equator.
    This thread is by far the funniest gag I've read in a long while.

    Ignatius, you da man!

  2. #102
    Member
    Registered: Oct 2001
    Location: Scotland
    I saw this thread when it had but three replies, and even now it still makes me laugh.

  3. #103
    Member
    Registered: Sep 2002
    Location: annarbah
    It's so nice to get such great feedback on this old post. I'm very flattered, but also a bit mystified since the original post was not a joke.

    I'm sorry that I'm not around much to chat with you all now... but as most of you know, I am a time traveller. And while it may appear that I'm lurking in 2003, I'm actually posting to TTLG quite often in 2011 (of course, all of you are there). I'm not really supposed to talk about what's happening in the future (because of the PoNMuT (Pact of Not Messing-up Time) signed in 2195 by Stalin and Lincoln), but I will reveal that in 2011 we (and that includes future you's) are very excited about Thief III finally going gold. It's really good, I have the demo. I would share it with you, but the req's are a bit steep (it requires a 2.5 terahertz processor). But it's really good, trust me. The AI is so advanced, that in the game you can actually sneak up on guards who are actually playing Thief I (and ghosting, at that).

    I don't want to reveal any more stuff, but in many ways 2011 is just like 2003. For one, TTLG is still having server trouble (of course, in 2011 the server is run entirely through Msledd's brain).

    Oh, one more thing... the 2011 sailoreagle wants to tell the 2003 sailoreagle to avoid that pool of glowing muck, unless she wants that extra set of eyes.

  4. #104
    Member
    Registered: Mar 2003
    Location: Singapore


    Really? Then I'd better not ask about myself then...

    .
    .

    Oh and those Go-Kart things are crazy! I'd just die if Thief was really going to a racing game.

    Funny as Hell!

  5. #105
    Member
    Registered: Mar 2003
    Location: Balt., MD
    Oh my god! That pic is fooken GOLD Ignatius!

    I'm glad people keep digging this up I want a go-kart with little "Garrett" license plates now

  6. #106
    Member
    Registered: Oct 2001
    Location: Scotland
    Originally posted by Ignatius
    Oh, one more thing... the 2011 sailoreagle wants to tell the 2003 sailoreagle to avoid that pool of glowing muck, unless she wants that extra set of eyes.
    You know, I always thought sailoreagle needed an extra set of eyes.

    Do you have a photo?

  7. #107
    New Member
    Registered: Apr 2003


    Now lets look at the weapons you get to use;

    bommersword: A modified version of garret's old sword. Now its thrown like a boomerang since swords dont work well at high speeds!

    Cracker jack: The candy. You spill it on the ground, and other racers stick to it. Nobody notices when you pull it out, unlike all the other weapons.

    Broadhead arrow: Just like they were in the original thief; now with the ability to flatten tires! They can still kill if aimed at the driver though. Hard to aim at high sppeds, though, especially when you should be paying attention to turning, and keeping your hands on the wheel while aiming, but whatever, anything goes. Make sure you only use arrows of any kind on a straightaway; that way you have time to actually pull back the string.

    water arrow: Creates a slippery surface on the road, and will ruin other driver's turning. Can also be used to clean up oil spills.

    Fire arrow: Just like the old fire arrows, all the way to the gravity-defying lack of an arc.

    Moss arrow: Will create a carpet of moss that will slow other drivers down. Differs from cracker jack in that you can actually moss up a person's wheel(s) if aimed right.

    Gas arrow: Has two uses: Can be used to knock people out, or to refuel your own gas tank. Always keep one handy for that reason. NOTE: People who die because of a crash that was caused by going unconscious from these arrows will count as a kill by you.

    Rope arrow: Buy in quantities of two. Creates a tripwire. First, fire one rope arrow onto one wall. Be sure to aim ahead so as to give yourself time to fire the next. After that hits, fire the other rope arrow at the other wall. If the two are close together enough, they will form a trip wire. Though you hsould fire the first arrow ahead of you, make sure you are ahead of both before the second one hits.


    (Ok, cant think of an effective use of the noisemaker arrow, but a few creative things here and there )

  8. #108
    Member
    Registered: Apr 2000
    Location: The Bardo
    Still hilarious after all these years!

  9. #109
    Member
    Registered: Nov 1999
    Location: The East Coast, Canada
    Originally posted by Ignatius
    For one, TTLG is still having server trouble (of course, in 2011 the server is run entirely through Msledd's brain).
    Well, I would've thought that it could be hosted by other body parts, such as [CENSORED] or [REALLY FUCKING CENSORED], but that could be messy.


  10. #110
    Member
    Registered: Mar 2001
    Location: UK
    Kudos!

    Man, my ribs burst like an undead hit by a holy arrow. There's a serious mess in this room, Ignatius, and it's all your fault.

    Missed it first time around, but this thread needs to remain high.

  11. #111
    Member
    Registered: Feb 2003
    Location: Atop a magical mushroom

    Funny

    THAT WAS FUNNY!

    -PRINCEMIKUS


  12. #112
    Member
    Registered: Jul 2003
    Originally posted by Rolewn

    (Ok, cant think of an effective use of the noisemaker arrow, but a few creative things here and there )
    Causes them to pit stop (engine noise)

  13. #113
    Member
    Registered: May 2001
    Location: The Nine Hells
    Marvelous.

    'tis only a shame that the world will still exist in 2011, seems like my plans are condemned to fail.

  14. #114
    Member
    Registered: Jan 2004
    Location: Canada
    hehehe I doubt a go-cart would be very stealthy though... Garrett's car is probably battery powered. heheh

  15. #115
    Member
    Registered: Dec 2003
    Location: New York
    ROTFL
    Now, we need to see one with Viktoria hunched over the wheel, chasing Garrett around.

  16. #116

  17. #117
    Member
    Registered: Oct 2003
    Location: Off the TTLG bus
    I'd forgotten about this thread.

    Christ, what did people used to to for quality entertainment before photoshopp?


  18. #118
    Member
    Registered: Jun 2003

    If Karras, apon victory says "I'm vewy, vewy happy" (yay Droopy!), then I'd personally go out and buy the game if it were to exist XE

  19. #119
    Member
    Registered: Dec 2003
    Location: UK Portsmouth
    i would not have see these pictures if this thread wa not brought back to the top of the forums... and i am bloody happy it was

    The main baddy is Mario and u have too knock him off his kart?

  20. #120
    Member
    Registered: Dec 2003
    Location: New York
    @ Theifsie Fool

    She wants his other eye.

  21. #121
    I'm worried that EIDOS marketing might see them pics and think: Hmmm ...

    The Honest Thief - FMs, screenshots, DromED, links

    Zaccheus' hospital blog

  22. #122
    Member
    Registered: Dec 2003
    Location: Brasília-Brazil
    godamnit
    i got all excited about the left top secret files that guy supposedly found, and then, blamo
    karts all over the place

    lmao, this one, was a good laugh

  23. #123
    New Member
    Registered: Dec 2003
    Location: Morrice, MI
    I just do not understand why this topic has not been moved to the T3 forum? All the others have......






    Great work Ignatius

  24. #124
    Member
    Registered: Feb 2004
    Location: Berlin
    I used the search mashine and found that.

    *ROTFL*

    Bright idea, Ignazius!!!

  25. #125
    Member
    Registered: May 2001
    Location: Italy
    funny killer.....

    ..... for a second i thought about killing my self.....

    rotfl---




    p.s. and it was made 1 year and half ago ? i see this post only now....
    Last edited by sterlino; 11th Feb 2004 at 17:03.

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