TTLG|Thief|Bioshock|System Shock|Deus Ex|Mobile
Page 17 of 67 FirstFirst ... 2712131415161718192021222732374247525762 ... LastLast
Results 401 to 425 of 1669

Thread: 1000 clues that you have been playing thief way to much ...

  1. #401
    Member
    Registered: Dec 2001
    1904: You don't care that you're post was overlooked, because it gives you the chance to contribute one more post to this thread!(Yes! check back at 1843, Khamoon should have started at 1844.)

  2. #402
    Member
    Registered: Jan 2001
    Location: Canada
    # 1905. You are such an enthusiast about this forum that you modify your account so that you can add everyone to your buddy list.

    # 1906. You also subscribe to every thread on the forum, ask to be informed of changes, updates, new threads and everything else.

    # 1907. You download the whole TTLG jukebox site.

    # 1908. You download the Thief music twice for security.

    # 1909. You put backups of all the thief music on disk by using winzip, disk spanning, and 3 weeks of your life (not to mention the roughly 10000 diskettes).

    # 1910. You download try, then calculate that you will actually need 13083.333 diskettes.

    For some, discipline is a lesson.
    For others, it is a lifetime.

  3. #403
    Member
    Registered: Mar 2001
    Location: Jersey City
    1911) You've discovered a new appreciation for Winona Ryder recently.

    1912) You create a forum thread for songs to play Thief by (guilty).

    1913) Your walls are covered with pictures of Bonnie and Clyde, The James Gang and other (in)famous bank robbers.

    1914) Your least favorite movie is "To Catch a Thief".

    1915) Your favorite movie character is Phillipe the Mouse (played by Mathew Broderick) from "Ladyhawke".

    1916) Your wardrobe consists solely of 300 black hooded cloaks.

    1917) You're convinced that the dancing zombie chorus line from the blooper reel are better than the Rockettes.

    1918) You also think they should have thier own Broadway Musical.

    1919) You're convinced that the dancing zombie chorus line are also more talented than the dancing zombies from the "Thriller" video.

    1920) You find out that there is, in fact, a musical called "Zombie Prom" which is being put on soon at a local theater (true).

    1921) Deciding that auditioning to be in the play is not nearly enough you apply to direct, choreograph, build the set, do the costumes, painting, designing the programs, ushering, running the lights and sound, answering phones at the box office, running the consession stand and starring in this musical! (ok that one isn't true).

    1922) You have a "fence" for the breadsticks you smuggle out of "The Olive Garden".

    1923) You insist on calling him "Cutty" even though his name is big, fat Sal.

    1924) He's part of your elite network of contacts which also includes Elsie, the cafeteria lady who gives your grandma extra lemon jell-o at the senior center.

    1925) You imagine you hear cool industrial/techno music playing everytime you execute one of these daring neighborhood crimes.
    Last edited by Spamlet; 28th Mar 2002 at 15:26.
    "That I an accessary needs must be
    To that sweet thief which sourly robs from me."
    William Shakespeare, sonnet 35

  4. #404
    New Member
    Registered: Mar 2002
    Location: 33 miles hubwards from Ankh-Mo

    Are we running out of steam?

    1926: You find a copy all Keeper glyphs from the games, study them, and realize that the Keeper prophecies were off, because based on the glyphs, the Trickster should have re-surfaced two years later than he did.

    1927: You proceed to correct the Keepers, and rewrite then entire 432 page glyphic prophecy

    -----------------------------------------------------------------------

    1928: You sleep during school so your senses are sharp at night when you play Thief

    1929: You realize that sleep is unnecessary and so is school

    1930: So you drop out and play 24/7

    1931: Without breaks for food

    1932: or going to the bathroom

    1933: After two weeks, you decide to eat, but you don't know what the hell all that stuff is in your refridgerator, and where the apples, cheese and deerlegs are.

    1934: You eat the most edible-looking thing which is:

    1935: The [poisonous] mushrooms in your back yard

    1936: And wonder why they don't glow, or make you high

    -----------------------------------------------------------------------

    1937: You've been out of social contact for so long, the only words you remember are from Thief, so you....

    1938: start a conversation with: "I expect my payment in gold, not liquor!"

    1939: As the person looks at you with a concerned look on his/her face, you squint at them, and ask them what their name is.

    1940: "Son, are you on drugs?" comes the reply

    -----------------------------------------------------------------------

    1941: Your husband/wife tells you that you say weird things in your sleep such as: "I'm going to retire in style...." and "Aaaah!! My eye, my eye!!!!"

    -----------------------------------------------------------------------

    1942: You call your psychiatrist "burrick-breath"

    1943: Your psychiatrist considers you his most challenging case

    1944: Your other psychiatrist has started his PHD thesis on you

    -----------------------------------------------------------------------

    --Shard

  5. #405
    Member
    Registered: Jan 2001
    Location: Canada
    1945. You make your own Smilie for this forum.
    For some, discipline is a lesson.
    For others, it is a lifetime.

  6. #406
    Member
    Registered: Mar 2002
    1946. you think of ways to use everyday objects as blackjacks then try them on yourself.
    There IS a Spoon, the little bald kid can go fu*k himself.

  7. #407
    Member
    Registered: Nov 2001
    Location: NY
    1947: the first thing you remember hearing, ever, is "I'm going to the bear pits tommorrow."

    1948:Someone sneaks into your house, and you help them steal everything, because you "know where all the loot is"

  8. #408
    Member
    Registered: Jul 1999
    Location: tr gse!
    1949: You take place in the following dialogue.
    "I'm calling this new puppy Benny."
    "He'll make a good watchdog, then!"
    "Why's that?"
    "If he sees a bad guy, he'll wave his sword at him..."

  9. #409
    Member
    Registered: Nov 2001
    Location: NY
    1950: You kill someone and hide the body behind a barrel 3 feet away, never expecting anyone to find it . . .

  10. #410
    Member
    Registered: Nov 2000
    Location: ttLg
    1951 : when your computer has melted.

  11. #411
    Member
    Registered: Mar 2001
    Location: Jersey City
    1952: Despite the fact that your computer has melted you continue to play reasoning that your melted computer actually adds to immersiveness because you can pretend that it was attacked by a fire elemental.

    1953: You ponder how that fire elemental was able to melt your computer since you took the extra precaution of installing a "firewall" for added computer security.

    1954: You then begin to wonder if a firewall wouldn't make a cool addition to Thief 3 being that you've read how it will contain giant water slides...

    1955: You decide you better practice so that Garrett will be adept at navigating those treacherous and tricky contraptions-so you head over to your local Six Flags amusement park.

    1956: When you arrive there and are confronted with numerous images of Batman you have mixed feelings about him; seeing as he does have a cool hooded cloak and lots of "wonderful toys" which you envy despite still realizing that there's only room for one shadowy, complex "Dark Knight" figure in this h'yar town.

    1957: You decide that the best solution to this dilemma is to rob Batman of his cool gear and outfits thus forcing him to retire early.

    1958: You then become confused by the fact you aren't sure which Batman is the real one: surely it can't be George Clooney or Val Kilmer since they were only Batman one time each. You decide to narrow it down to Keaton and West.

    1959: You break into Adam West's house and steal his Batman stuff (because let's face it you know he's kept everything) but then realize that the version of Batman gear he wore and used was neither cool nor anything even approaching a threat to you.

    1960: You realize Micheal Keaton doesn't possess power of any kind at this stage in his career either or else you'd remember the last time you saw him in a new movie.

    1961: You suddenly remember that the last time Keaton starred in a movie was the torturously bad "Jack Frost" (in which he is reincarnated as a snowman) and you deduce from that fact that he's now even less of a threat than Adam West.

  12. #412
    New Member
    Registered: Mar 2002
    Location: 33 miles hubwards from Ankh-Mo

    More!!! 2 Grand!!!!

    1962: You look through all of your other computer games and rate them 1-10 on their similarity to Thief(true story)

    1963: You sell Half-Life, Quake I, Quake II, and Quake III on eBay, and then buy second copies of Thief Gold and Thief II, then without touching the seal or the shrink-wrap, you frame them on your wall

    1964: You stalk Stephen Russell because you want to surgically remove his vocal chords and larynx and then implant them into yourself.

    1965: You make a 'Trickster' dummy, learn how to 'throw' your voice, and then scare your little brother so bad he wets himself....

    1966: ....Your little brother is 25.

    1967: You argue with yourself about Viktoria's virginity

    1968: You argue with your parents about Viktoria's virginity

    1969: You get your brother/sister/sibling to punch you when you lose health in the game, to heighten the realism...

    1970: ....He/she knocks you out in the cutscene between RTC and Escape!.....

    1971: ....As you wake up, you quickly feel for your eye.....

    1972: .....And try to make your sibling cut it out

    1973: ......Using twigs and vines....

    --Shard

  13. #413
    New Member
    Registered: Mar 2002
    Location: 33 miles hubwards from Ankh-Mo
    1974: You've been playing for so long that your vision has gotten so bad you can't see anything further than the distance to your computer screen.....

    1975: And you like it that way

    1976: Your eyes have evolved to compensate for the constant darkness...

    1977: Light scares you....

    1978: ......More than pitch blackness

    1979: You haven't eaten in 2 months.....

    1980: You stay alive by eating the paper on your desk next to your computer....

    1981: ....because the sound reminds you of eating apples/deer legs/ bread in-game.

    --------------------------------------------

    1982: You've learned to voluntarily stop your heart(to simulate pain).........

    1983: ..........You've lost the ability to control it, and now it happens in response to in-game pain automatically......

    1984: You die in two days (Can't save and reload

    ----------------------------------------------

    1985: You sacrifice your cat to the Builder.

    1986: You sacrifice your brother to the Builder.

    1987: You sacrifice your mailman to the Builder. (He interrupted your most sacred pastime!)

    ----------------------------------------------

    1988: You can recite the contents of all of the CRF files.

    1989: You can recite the contents of all the OSM files.

    1990: You wrote a better manual for Thief Gold

    -------------------------------------------------------------

    1991: You taught your grandma(who doesn't know anything about computers) how to play Thief.......

    1992: She finished it with more loot than you.......

    1993: And three hours faster.

    1994: Your grandpa died while she played.........

    1995: .....and she called it the Builder's wish.

    ---------------------------------------------------------------

    1996: All your parents' conversations with you begin with: "Son, can you pause for a sec?"

    1997: You're not sure what day it is.

    1998: You're not sure what month it is...

    1999: You're not sure what year it is....

    OK, c'mon, who wants it? It better be a good one, damn it, or I'm gonna be pissed!

    Shard

  14. #414
    Member
    Registered: Mar 2001
    Location: Jersey City
    2000) A few years ago when everyone was worrying that civilization as we know it would end due to the year 2000 [y2k] bug (appropriately enough for this clue, eh?) your biggest concern was not that there would be no money, or light or heat or food... No, my fellow Thief obsessed friends you were only thinking of the fact that you would never play Thief again. The prospect of that caused you to buy a gun and point it at your head and stare at your screen playing with only one hand up until the moment it was all supposed to go wrong. You rightly figured that if there was no Thief there was no reason to be on this miserable planet anymore. You also knew that if you did have to plant the bullet in the rich soil of your fertile imagination your death would not be in vain. You would set an example for every Thief player that a game this good: that you wake up every day to live for; is damn sure worth dying for.

    2001) Besides you reckon that if there is such a thing as an afterlife in paradise that means you will be able to play Thief from beyond the grave (and also hang out with all the undead that you met in the game).


    (I hope those were worthy enough, Shard. Yours had me peeing my pants with laughter. By the way the year it is is the same number where you get to pick it up from: we'll be to 3000 in no time my friend!)
    "That I an accessary needs must be
    To that sweet thief which sourly robs from me."
    William Shakespeare, sonnet 35

  15. #415
    Member
    Registered: Jul 1999
    Location: tr gse!
    Bah and bah again! I missed the 2000. Oh well, maybe I'll delete the thread or something. I'm evil, bwahaha.

  16. #416
    BANNED
    Registered: May 2001
    Location: Somewhere in Canada
    ...when this forum and the game starts feeling like home, and the real world like a fantasy - whoops - already there.

  17. #417
    Member
    Registered: Jul 2001
    Location: The Shadows
    Originally posted by Fred Chook
    Bah and bah again! I missed the 2000. Oh well, maybe I'll delete the thread or something. I'm evil, bwahaha.
    That is evil. More evil than...kicking puppies, or designing a room filled with puppies just so you can go in and kick them.
    Not quite a falcon, but close enough to be just as dangerous.
    Clan NBU~Just 'cause you can't see us doesn't mean we aren't there.
    Go play some thief!

  18. #418

    "You stay alive by eating the paper on your desk next to your computer.... "

    HA HA HA !
    LOL.
    The Honest Thief - FMs, screenshots, DromED, links

    Zaccheus' hospital blog

  19. #419
    Member
    Registered: Nov 2001
    Location: NY
    Originally posted by Spamlet
    2000) A few years ago when everyone was worrying that civilization as we know it would end due to the year 2000 [y2k] bug (appropriately enough for this clue, eh?) your biggest concern was not that there would be no money, or light or heat or food... No, my fellow Thief obsessed friends you were only thinking of the fact that you would never play Thief again. The prospect of that caused you to buy a gun and point it at your head and stare at your screen playing with only one hand up until the moment it was all supposed to go wrong. You rightly figured that if there was no Thief there was no reason to be on this miserable planet anymore. You also knew that if you did have to plant the bullet in the rich soil of your fertile imagination your death would not be in vain. You would set an example for every Thief player that a game this good: that you wake up every day to live for; is damn sure worth dying for.
    2002: You consider that for a minute, then decide its better to strap a mine to your head. This way, you cannot MOVE your head away from the screen. (blasphemy!!! )

  20. #420
    New Member
    Registered: Mar 2002
    Location: 33 miles hubwards from Ankh-Mo
    *Shard mumbles to himself that number 2K should have been better.....

    2003: You print this list and frame it on your wall next to your monitor, so you can check stuff off

  21. #421
    Member
    Registered: Apr 2002
    Location: Pennsylvania, USA
    2004) You get a 0 on your Sunday school test because all you can remember is Hammerite/Mechanist scripture

    2005) You petition your favorite restaurant to start serving steaks made from dead spiders

    2006) You hear a real thief prowling around your house, and you pray that he's playing on expert and not one of the levels where he's allowed to kill you

  22. #422
    Member
    Registered: Apr 2002
    Location: Bulgaria

    Curunir enters the GRAND list

    2007) You are convinced that the GAME Thief and Dayport are just a figment of your imagination. You know very well that in real life your name is Garrett and you wear black stylish clothes and walk around messing with the dead and robbing people blind
    2008) You have completely forgotten what the Ctrl-Alt-Shift-End key combo does
    2009) You no longer take pleasure when you hear a drunken guard sing and mumble (man, a bad one that! take a break from the game and then try to enjoy it again!)
    2010) You actually care to even force a smile while reading these lines

  23. #423
    Member
    Registered: Apr 2002
    Location: Bulgaria
    2011) You no more wake up using an alarm clock, it gets you on the edge of a nervous breakdown

    2012) You no longer allow your pet to enter your room while you're playing. Your cat once hopped on your back while you were playing the Bonehoard. The consequences were evenly bad for the both of you. You ended up with a twitch on one of your eyes and the cat got later on so badly beaten that it spewed its guts.

    Goodness me, this list will only end when Armageddon comes!

  24. #424
    New Member
    Registered: Mar 2002
    Location: 33 miles hubwards from Ankh-Mo

    Scraping the bottom here........

    2013: You get mail from the government asking you if you're all right.

    2014: The CIA wants to hire you for your espionage skills.

    2015: One day, you get up to go to the bathroom and notice for the first time that you have a cat.

    2016: You understood the last one....

    2017: .....and sympathized.

    2018: You try to leave your house to go to buy some food, but you forgot where the supermarket is.....

    2019: ....upon further reflection, you forgot where you live......

    2020: .....and upon further reflection, you decide to raid your neighbor's house because you don't remember how to drive.


    --Shard

  25. #425
    Member
    Registered: Apr 2002
    Location: A castle of lesbian vampyres (aka #haze)
    2021) You find a thief forum and achieve member status within the first day of being on it
    [taffercode] 1d+++1g+++2++3?H+++M++N+R+T+++U+++Z++G++L+O=P++Q=I++K+A+++B+++D+++X+++
    J+S=W++Y+C++(MBOP)E+F++V++SWRD+++RTRN+++ESC+++COUR++BLUD++SABO++[/taffercode]

    Haze, Head Psychologist and Lagologologist, Clan Foofie! We are the party!

Page 17 of 67 FirstFirst ... 2712131415161718192021222732374247525762 ... LastLast

Tags for this Thread

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •