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Thread: 1000 clues that you have been playing thief way to much ...

  1. #51

    1002 you then decide to go for the 2000 mark.

    1003 you find a beefy burger aside buger

    1004 you then decide to order an odd looking greenish drinkthat they described as lemonade.

    1005 you then figure out that it was **** that came from a hybrid in the back alley.

    1006 AHHHHHHH!!!!!!! you get ur grenade luancher and blow the *********** out of buger king for planting that in ur drink.

    1007 you then decide to make the manager of the BK to eat a high explosive

    1008 he then swallows it and you say "BYE!!!!! KA BOOOMM!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

    1009 u find all his remains splattered and cooked around the destroyed area

    1010 you get his eyeballs and light'em up and shoot them into space
    1011 oK! enough of that.

    1012 Lets go see JO JO the Idiot circus boy BOO!!!

    1013 JOJO JOJO JOJO IS gonna fall into the snake pit

    1014 well he did but it wasn't a snake pit, it was "The MANY"

    1015 you run outside and get on a shuttle to saturn.

    1016 "Welcome to saturn we hope u have a pleasant stay"

    1017 That voice sounds familiar could it be....

    1018 AAHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

    1019 you get on another shuttle back to earth.

    1020 you get off and head home.

    1021 you then wonder why none is out side.

    1022 You see the reflection in the sky, it looks like some one you've seen before.

    1023 when you see the clouds change it revealed the horrifying picture

    1024 IT WAS SHODAN, she already taken over earth w/o me knowing it.

    1025 Earth was now turned into cyborgs and droids and all them.

    1026 Aint this ever gonna stop?????

    1027 You stroke a key

    1029 Freeze frame computer

    1030 it was all just a freakin hollusination i think?

    1031 you find an OS upgrade unit nearby

    1032 you decide to upgrade your weapons to Heavy artillery

    1033 you got your upgrades but something doesnt seem right

    1034 you feel as if something was in your body.

    1035 you cant describe the intense pain but you feel something moving in you.



  2. #52
    Fred Chook


  3. #53

    ermm... hackmaster... two things:
    1 - there were two pages to this thread, so you were off by a bit in your numbering. of course, before you read this, you'll have to figure that out, and by that point you won't need it...

    2 - what the hell?...


  4. #54
    Keeper Mallinson

    I counted: we're now at #1088.

  5. #55
    Keeper Mallinson

    Err, wait a minute, I just read these. What the hell? I don't think we should even count those.

  6. #56
    Keeper Mallinson

    #1056 Every time you go on a road trip you put the Thief soundtrack into your CD player (assuming such a thing existed), playing the same song over and over and over.

    Ok, so it's not that funny, but I'm doing this so the thread doesn't die! Come on, people! This is TTLG Forums' pride! This is Fred Chooks' pride! Don't let it die!!

    By the time you find a lightswitch, I'll already be gone...

  7. #57

    #1057 You get onto a bus in Winchester, England, and say: "RTC, please".
    #1058 While sitting in the garden with your girl friend, you notice how jumping onto the garden bench would allow you to mantle onto the roof of her house (true story).

  8. #58

    1059: You get a large hammer from the garage and begin to hunt heretics.

    The devil just got a new name....
    Kernell32.dll screws your computer without regrets

  9. #59
    Keeper Mallinson

    Why does this toic have text stretching further than my screen? It's so annoying!! Can we change that?

  10. #60

    I was just wondering if soulstripper ever got credit anywhere for starting this thread on the original forumn? Even though most of the people that came from the old forumn remember who started it I think it should be obvious maybe at the beggining of this thread.....just to give credit where its due
    of course croft deserves credit also for moving the whole bloody thing

    did that shadow just move?oh well.Had to much coffea this mornin im twitchy as hell.tahhrum,tahhrum,tatarum.

  11. #61

    you act like gaylesaver does in school and make zombie noises during gym and math. all the seniors threaten him. he also memorized all the hammer prayers and the builder stuff, and the woodsie lord poems.

  12. #62
    Keeper Mallinson

    Bullrush, you need to put a number in front of your addition. Yours is # 1060.

  13. #63

    These might be more "Signs You've Been DromEditing Too Much", but anyway,

    1061: You look at shadows everywhere you go and decide the Dark engine handles them better than reality ("Who left the world on Quick Light?").

    1062: You walk into a cool building and think "nice brushwork".

    1063: You play Mario 64 for the first time in about a year and realize the worlds are created with the same geometric primitives as in Thief. The illusion ruined, you wonder what their level editor is like.

  14. #64

    #1064: you speed up to finish your work, go home, start Thief and you are really suprised to see how fast is your CD-ROM, how smooth are the videos this day.
    The problem there si no CD-ROM in your drive.
    You've simply forgotten that you put all the videos on your drive and used a crack to run without CD long, long time ago.

    #1065: You're seriously considering not installing WoT, because the 600Meg installation above full your hard drive.

  15. #65

    #1066: You go to chrch to confess your sins.
    Suddenly, the priest start coughing, your eyes go wide full of horror, and you think
    "What is that hellish Haunt in disguise!!"
    and start spashing him with holy water.
    After 5 minutes you realize that it has ablsolutly no effect, and that the priest look at you, the face full of mercy and compassion for the lost soul you are.
    At that point you realize your mistake.
    "Sorry, brother Murus, I haven't recognize you!"

  16. #66

    1067 (maybe): you change the names of your ferrets to Garret and Taffer-boy.

  17. #67

    1068: You hide your Thief CD so that your younger brother can't play (and, probably, scratch) it, even though you haven't played it yourself for about two months.

    1069: You bought half a new computer just to play Thief.

    1070: You kept a straight face when you told the Parents you needed the upgrade for work.

    Move silently, leave no witnesses.

  18. #68
    Fred Chook

    1071: Your Thief-Based society declares war on another Thief-Based society.
    1072: You then declare a cease-fire, so that both sides may fight against the hideous little spy daring to call himself Farkus.
    By the way, Lytha, are you going to do the 'Secrets-and-Acheivments' clues for the Gold missions?
    1073: Your fan missions, when finished, will have more characters than the original Thief.
    1074: At your current rate, you'll have more MISSIONS than the original Thief. 10 so far!
    1075: You seriously consider starting the NO SPIDERS thread again, as it was so much fun.
    1076: " " " " " Plot questions, or things that make you go hmmm... " " " " " ".
    1077: You complete an RPG with pitiful weapons and low skill by using Thief tactics.
    It was Dink Smallwood, by the way. Walkthrough said kill Seth with Flame Bow and a lot of health potions, killed him with a light sword and a paranoid disposition.
    1078: You suffer withdrawl symptoms when you shut Thief down.

    Check out the Chook Quintology!
    Coming soon-
    "Fall Of A Chook", "Eidrel's Quest", "Mortan's Call", "The Tombs Of J'Rosse"
    -Fred Chook, Sinister Soldier, SPCF President, 1000th clue-writer.

  19. #69
    Fred Chook

    1079: You suddenly realise that way back at 1005, KM refered to you as High King Of The Forum. Talk about a rise to power!

  20. #70

    Hrm, I'm a newb but I'll try.

    1080) You lead the police on a merry car chase hoping to plow into a Mafia-run building so they'll kill each other off..............all to avoid a speeding ticket.

    1081) While playing RTC, you suddenly realize you're holding the phone........and have no idea who is waiting on the line or how long they've been there. (True story. )

  21. #71
    Keeper Mallinson

    LOL @ # 1081: that's happened to me!! More than once!

    I'm still here, Fred. I hope you're not under the impression that you're safe on that little throne of yours.

  22. #72

    # 1082 You actually (at last) manage it to play Lost City in the "0-damage way". Yeehaw!

    # 1083 You're so ecstatic about that event, that you happily go to Undercover, and play it w/out dealing any damages too... good that hammering people does not count as dealing damages.

    # 1084 You survive a frontal assault against the Inquisitor: You armed with a hammer, he is awake and armed with his spells.

  23. #73

    1085) You won't eat anything except for apples, cheese, carrots, whole legs of deer, cucumbers, etc...

    1086) When you go to the butchers shop to get a deer leg, you take it back saying "It didn't sound right!"

    1087) You paint all the knives in your kitchen black so that they aren't as obviious when you've got one drawn...

  24. #74

    Attention! It becomes even goofier:

    # 1088 You know from which OM this screenshot is taken.

    # 1089 You know the name of the building that we see on the screenshot.

    # 1090 You know the name of the building the player is currently standing on.

    # 1091 Without having to check the map of that mission.

    # 1092 You know which of the roofs in that mission is the most tricky one, because it has lots of strange sky-textured blocks floating above of it.

    # 1094 You have been at exactly the same position where the player is on that screenshot.

    # 1095 ... without using the dromed.

    # 1096 You could recall the way to that position from your memory without having to think much about it.

    # 1097 You have seen a very strange area in that mission that was only accessible via the roofs.

    # 1098 You were slightly annoyed because there was no equipment hidden.

    # 1099 You were also slighly annoyed because you could not reach a certain roof (that is the key to the way out) from where you are entered the roofs.

    # 2000 None of these points above in this posting were too cryptical for you, and you understood every hint and nudge at once.

  25. #75

    Shouldn't that be 1100, Lytha?


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