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Thread: 1000 clues that you have been playing thief way to much ...

  1. #1501
    Member
    Registered: Sep 2009
    Location: The Olde Quarter

    Number 3432

    #3432: You go to church, reach into your jacket to get the Holy Bible, then take out the Thief: The Dark Project in it's Jewel Casing, containing the disk. You slide the manual and start reading. You keep re-reading it to yourself; you decide to look up, and see that church is over.

  2. #1502
    Member
    Registered: Apr 2005
    Location: Heart of Darkness
    Quote Originally Posted by Brother_Murus View Post
    #3432: You go to church, reach into your jacket to get the Holy Bible, then take out the Thief: The Dark Project in it's Jewel Casing, containing the disk. You slide the manual and start reading. You keep re-reading it to yourself; you decide to look up, and see that church is over.
    #3432: You don't go to the church because you realize that the crazy forest folk that worship the horned beast are actually the ones that are right. Then you go meet their "god" and kill him, and you never have to go to church again.

  3. #1503
    New Member
    Registered: Dec 2009
    Location: Portugal @ Paradise
    #3433 - your wife gets angry once again because you show up with a high quantity of each of several vegetables and bread loafs, instead of the roast chicken you were supposed to have brought for dinner.

    #3434 - you still make attempts on stealing keys from people's belts and picking locks, even though you don't realize you're already in a madhouse.

    #3435 - you stare at the copper jar in your living room for hours, walking around it and leaning, and finally you get mad and call the softwere provider to announce it has a bug: "it just won't get lit up!".

    #3436 - You follow that guy that entered the convenience store, after you did, but didn't buy anything and looked at you in a funny way before he left.

    #3437 - You have a hand-crafted rope arrow that you use to re-paint the highest part of the outside walls of your house.

    #3438 - You start yelling at people when you show them how well you imitate Stephen Russel and they start laughing histericaly.

    #3439 - Your friends are already used to have you just listening to their conversations while hidding in some dark corner. Even tho they still look behind their shoulders.

    #3440 - You hand-crafted some moss arrows to prevent your boss from noticing you're late for work again.

    #3441 - You obcessively avoid any floor in your house that isn't a carpet.

    #3442 - You start saying "how's it goin'" to people you've never seen before, in the middle of the street.

    #3443 - After trying to open every door of every house in your neighborhood you think "omg wtf this game is so limited!"

    #3444 - You go to england and try to sabotage the Big Ben.

    #3445 - You see some monks on a tv documentary and you think "these keepers are getting way too careless..."

    #3446 - You get the police knocking on your door for trying to rob their station last night.

    #3447 - Those same policemen say you also tried to rob the national bank and the Sherif's house.

    # 3448 - You reply them with "bah, you guys aren't worth it. You got no security robots. Taffers"

    #3449 - One day you stare at your computer, puzzled, and thinking "What the hell is this thing doing here? The hammers haven't invented it yet!"

    #3450 - You sneak behind your wife and steal every piece of food she has there while she is making dinner.

    #3451 - You immediatelly eat all that food cuz you know you're already with full health, and probably won't need it anyway.

    #3452 - You try very hard to rip of that taxi roof light that has just lit up.
    Last edited by Skaruts; 3rd Dec 2009 at 02:37.

  4. #1504
    Member
    Registered: Nov 2003
    Location: Thief fan since ca. 1999

    Those are good Skaruts. Oh, and welcome to TTLG!

  5. #1505
    New Member
    Registered: Dec 2009
    Location: Portugal @ Paradise
    thank you

  6. #1506
    Member
    Registered: Feb 2007
    #3453: The nostalgia induced by Thief is so strong, it almost makes you feel high.

  7. #1507
    Member
    Registered: Nov 2008
    Location: green bay, wisconsin
    Anyone know of any taffers anonymous meetings around?

  8. #1508
    New Member
    Registered: Dec 2009
    Location: Portugal @ Paradise
    #3454 - Your wife comes in and you ask her: "Hey! Who are you? How did you find me?? (!!)"

  9. #1509
    New Member
    Registered: Jul 2004
    #3455: You become obsessed with a murderous rage anytime a stranger sings "La La La"

  10. #1510
    Member
    Registered: Nov 2003
    Location: Sheffield, UK
    #3456: you know the routes and timings of all the local police patrols

  11. #1511
    Member
    Registered: Apr 2008
    #3457: You don't know the routes and timings of all the local police patrols. You knocked them all out ages ago.

  12. #1512
    New Member
    Registered: Dec 2009
    Location: Portugal @ Paradise
    #3458 - you find yourself in a daily routine of "touring" the police stations, banks and even the mob's headquarters, with a notebook and a pencil in your pocket.

    #3459 - you start getting in your head that your neighbor must have an Velvet Bag too, since he also has a cat.

    (Edit - fixed)
    Last edited by Skaruts; 5th Dec 2009 at 08:04.

  13. #1513
    Member
    Registered: Sep 2008
    Location: In the Present Perfect
    I once had this very strange dream, after I've been watching too much Star Trek TNG and playing waaaaay to much Thief, where I was sneaking in the City with a phaser in my hand and Starfleet uniform, and with a combadge that was the Esc button

    It was really cool, I only woke up when I've been repeatedly slapping the combadge for 2 minutes, trying to bring up the menu. By that time, alas, I knew it was only a dream.

  14. #1514
    New Member
    Registered: Mar 2009
    #3460 - you find yourself now creating a FM that will incorporate Star Trek TNG elements including a phaser gun as a weapon of choice based on someones dream about sneaking through a city as a Trekkie.

    * Snaps out of hypnosis *
    Last edited by lockheed872; 13th Apr 2010 at 22:37.

  15. #1515
    Member
    Registered: Apr 2008
    #3461 - You suspect that Graham Central Station are pagans after writing a song called "We Be's Getting Down".

  16. #1516
    Member
    Registered: Jan 2009
    Location: In your house, looting
    #3462 When you keep a safe distance from daddy longleggs like it would be a thief spider thinking "what if it jumps at me?"

  17. #1517
    Member
    Registered: Feb 2008
    Location: on a mission to civilize
    #3463: At first, you are unable to spell Thief correctly, having used the correct spelling of their all your life. Now, you are unable to spell thier correctly.

  18. #1518
    New Member
    Registered: Apr 2010
    Location: In the dark nowhere of my mind
    #3464: You create a thread "1000 reasons why I play too much Thief" that lasts for more than 10 years (glory to the one who did this!)

    #3465: When you get Garret to lean, you subconsciounsly lean as well trying to see what's beyond the end of the screen

    #3466: You spend more than a week trying to find a way to make Thief I and II work on 32-bit Vista on a shitty laptop

  19. #1519
    New Member
    Registered: Apr 2010
    Location: In the dark nowhere of my mind
    #3467: You make your friends never play the game ever because you talk too much about it and they get sick of it.

    #3468: After 3467, your friends start playing just to stop you from using the following persuasion methods to get them start the game: blackjacking them, stealing their wallets and sneaking behind them to scare them.

    #3469: You forget to bring a book with you at school and you are about to load a saved slot of your life in your brain to fix the mistake, then you realise you are not playing Thief and feel sad about it and you start missing your PC and the game.

    #3470: You paintspray Constantine's Eye Symbol everywhere.

    #3471: You have 50 Megabytes of screenshots from the game, most of them consisting of piles of unconscious and dead Guards, Hammerites and Ratmen.

    #3472: You view the screenshots and remember how many times you had to repeat the levels because the computer crashed.

    #3473: You then remember that your computer always crashed at the mission for the Horn of Quintus, when you would lure all zombies you could find to a single trap that would fire a purple bolt every 5 seconds (you still remember the timing) and because there were at least 6-7 zombies in pieces on the floor, the sound would stuck in repeating the squashing sound of zombies exploding and then your computer crashed. As a result your computer was fried and you had to buy a new one

  20. #1520
    Member
    Registered: May 2009
    Location: Hurr Durr
    Quote Originally Posted by Lord Ornlu View Post
    #3469: ...and you are about to load a saved slot of your life in your brain to fix the mistake...
    This, all though I was taking a lot of acid at the time (Game was MDk if I recall which needed the saves patched in)

  21. #1521
    Every time you leave your house you mutter "Here we go!".

  22. #1522
    New Member
    Registered: May 2010
    #3474 : You dream about thief in first person view, in new levels your mind instantly creates.

    That is weird, because i can't think about new levels while i'm awake !!
    And after such a dream, i want to play thief again, it's like a sublime vicious circle.

  23. #1523
    Member
    Registered: Oct 2009
    Location: Pará de Minas, Brazil
    3475 - You wonder what would be better: Install carpet in all your house, so you can sneak quietly out of your house if the bulldogs show up, or if you should make it full of tile floors, so other taffers can't get in your place without wasting a endless supply of moss arrows.

  24. #1524
    Member
    Registered: Aug 2006
    Location: Deutschland
    Speaking of houses...

    3476: You install pressure plate traps in the shady sideways of a long corridor leading to your treasury because you think no thief would walk along the well-lit middle.

  25. #1525
    Member
    Registered: Apr 2005
    Location: Heart of Darkness
    3477 - When you're trying to design a great stealth game, and you're trying to get the sneakiness just perfect you always feel like you're stealing everything from Thief.

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